I've been using my 255ml bottle of Sliquid Silk for over three years now and it's only half gone. That's more impressive when you take into account my partner and I have had sex about 5 days a week on average during that entire time. I can't claim to be any good at math, but I think that puts us up at almost 800 uses. Let's knock off a hundred for the times we couldn't get to the lube and fifty for the times pointless times we tried others - 650 sex sessions and only half the bottle gone. Sounds crazy, yes? Yes! That's how amazing this lubricant is. That's how little you need. That's how long it stays slippery. That's how well it keeps. I bought this lubricant after reading the testimony of a large sex toy review site: they mentioned they had tried dozens upon dozens of lubes in their sex toy travels, and weren't open to trying more. But a persuasive salesperson convinced them to try it, and now the lube had pride of place on their bedside cabinet and had made all the others irrelevant. This was a convincing enough anecdote for me and it turns out their Sliquid story changed my sex life forever. Before I gush more, let me slip back into 'professional, objective review' mode. This particular Sliquid is one of the first released by the company, and as such it suffers from rather cheap and uninspired packaging. I will admit that when I first received my bottle of Sliquid Silk, I was a little dubious. A plain plastic bottle with a poorly printed sticker wrapped around it, and not a very pretty one either. This has turned out to be a mixed blessing - unlike prettier packaged lubricants such as the Durex Play range, this bottle doesn't attract attention at ALL. It is thoroughly uninteresting and will have a hard time catching prying eyes. I live at home and feel absolutely comfortable leaving it out next to my bedside table - I have so much stuff laying out in my bedroom all the time I have a lot of confidence my bottle of Sliquid isn't going to be the thing someone stops to examine. The writing on the packaging does shine with far more personality than most lubricants do however - the lubricant's proud claim that it "Lasts longer than most Hollywood marriages!" still makes me giggle after three years. The bottle is well sealed and the cap functional. The dispenser flips up and down and while lubricant might sometimes get caught in the entrance and dried up if one isn't careful when putting it away, it is very easily removed and disposed of. | Packaging: 4 smiles out of 5 | When you first pour some Sliquid Silk, you'll notice two things at once - it has a deliciously smooth, cool, thick and creamy consistency, and it looks a lot like male or female ejaculate. It's a little intimidating to have a lubricant look so like one of our bodily secretions, but also a little comforting to know that it's probably going to be a good companion to the juices flowing 'down there'. It is absolutely scentless - you could literally shove it up your nose and not smell a difference - and tasteless too, although I'm not sure if it's explicitly edible. | Consistency: 5 smiles out of 5 | | Odour: 5 smiles out of 5 | Taste: 5 smiles out of 5 | This stuff is VERY slippery. And it takes a very, very long time to dry up. This is great with regard to what it was made to do, but it means that when you smear some on yourself or your partner, it's going to get all over your hands, and you're going to need a towel handy. I occasionally try to wipe my hands on the bedsheets when I don't have a towel nearby and even that part of the sheet will stay slippery and cool for a while. | Slipperiness: 5 smiles out of 5 | I'm very tight and my partner large, and even with most lubricants it's a (painful) struggle to get him inside me. Not so with Sliquid. Just a small puddle on a finger or two is enough to provide an entire sessions lubrication. It is so very slippery that sometimes I just *oops* slide right in and the consistency is thick/creamy enough at first that I think provides a little bit of a buffer on the way in, so entry is not painful like it would otherwise be. This stuff just lasts and lasts. Once inside, it warms to body temperature immediately and feels just like 'me' - I can't tell we've used any lube at all, I simply feel very wet. This is a marked difference to other lubricants we've tried like KY Jelly, which is very sticky and a noticeably different consistency to my own lubrication. | Performance: 5 smiles out of 5 | Our sessions average about 25 minutes, and we have never had to top up during a 'regular' session. If we go longer and switch positions often, we might find ourselves adding a tiny bit more (less than the first time, as the lube 'reactivates' upon touching wetness) but even then it's a rare occasion that it doesn't last us the full stretch. | Duration: 5 smiles out of 5 | Cleanup is easy. Sliquid Silk is completely non-sticky and wipes up easily and completely. You won't find little white dried-up patches on your skin later like you might with some lubricants, I assume if you miss some during cleanup it either gets absorbed or wipes onto something else. | Cleanup: 5 smiles out of 5 | Sliquid Silk is the best of the many lubricants I've tried, and Liquid Silk is the only one that comes even close to its greatness. We've had the same bottle for 3 years and it still works just as well as the day we got it and I expect it will for another three years. Please note that it should not be used with silicone toys despite it being a 'hybrid formula' and that for maximum safety you should use an anal lubricant for anal sex, although I have used Sliquid Silk for anal without incident. Perhaps best of all Sliquid Silk is free of nasty chemicals and vegan-friendly. I've recommended it to all my friends and those who have tried it agree that they would never be without it again. | Overall Smile Factor: 5 smiles out of 5 |